It is time to return to long form blogging. It is funny how there are many things which I would love to write when I am not in a position to do so. But today I will start anew writing these down.

Today particularly I have been reading on faith and praying about what it means to have little faith or no faith.

Wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field, which to day is, and to morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith? Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed? (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Take therefore no thought for the morrow:for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof. (Matt 6:30-34)

Jesus tells us that when we see our dependence on what we can measure we should take no thought for these things. What we actively need to do is to seek the kingdom, and the righteousness of God. It reminds me that Paul said in Romans that the failure of the leaders in Israel was based on seeking their own righteousness instead of the righteousness of God. To trust that my right doing or my right thinking will give me right standing with God leads me to depend upon those things rather than to trust solely in Jesus.

The first thing to know is that:
But without faith it is impossible to please him:for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him. (Heb 11:6)

So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God (Rom 10:17)

Seeking first the kingdom will bring you to the place of hearing the word of God; and obedience to the word and not your own idea will lead you into faith. The Holy Spirit is with me and sees and knows everything about my life, there is nothing hidden from him. Jesus made a way that I could live not my life, but His.

The fact is that Jesus loved ME so much that he died so that I might live. When I live by my own strength I come to places of doubt as to God's love for me. Oh, I may not call them such, but searching out the place of humility leads me to understand that it is true. To stand in a place of trust in what I have done, or what I can do or understand puts my trust in me and not in God.

The best news in all this searching is the knowledge that the power of repentance is there for me. In all sincerity of heart calling out to the Father and declaring my lack of trust (sin) and asking for the cleansing of the blood leads to complete freedom from that sin. Faith does not require intensity of effort so much as intensity of relationship.

So today I will seek first the kingdom!